..we are who we are..

..we are who we are..I'm not just repeating myself, I'm also swanning in a fact..let me break it down a little..a happy person stays always happy..a miserable person always miserable..repressed stays repressed..suppressed stays suppressed..hopeful stays hopeful..naive stays naive..I could go on..but you get the idea..

..I'm not saying there aren't any life changing incidents..there are..I'm just saying that people doesn't change just because they might have started seeing things in a new different light..probably after this "life-changing-incident"..but a person changing, is a completely different thing, it's on an entirely desparate level altogether..they might have just realized something..discovered something..which makes more sense at that particular point of time..maybe until the next 'life-changing-incident'..all it does is to change their outlook..that's all..but does this really change them, fundamentally?..or is it just that, that we call change.. the happy would find another reason to be happy..the miserable would find another thing to be miserable about..

..the reason why we are like this is irrelevant..and the reason why you are a particular type of person right now is also irrelevant because this is 2011 and we still haven't invented the advent "Time-Machine"..we still haven't discovered the x-ray glasses that let's you see people naked for crying out loud..forget a Time-Machine..so we will continue to go with the "bury-the-past" construct..

..what's relevant is the question..what will happen, when that person realizes this?..will he change, when he realizes that the way he feel right now is completely his prerogative..that it was just a drawn-out but simple (only complicated looking) choice he made in his life somewhere in the past..and that he still and always had complete control over it..will he be able to let go of all the episodes and his interpretations of it?..this would probably change him..wait, i said probably..did I just realize that I am not just the happy but also the hopeful?..so is this one of those "life-changing-incidents"?..so anyways..I don't know about you, but what I have realized now is that, yes, people never change..we just discover new shades for ourselves..like attributes to the class..life is always about discoveries right..see, even life doesn't change :)

..now reading the crap i have just written made me realize that I am also the self-righteous narcissistic-ally zen-full types..hmm..too many discoveries for a write-up i say..and the most funny and also the most relevant thing is - even after we realize all this, we just don't wanna change..we are who we are..

..oh ma weed...

..If there is a God, then weed is the gift from him..and he's telling..its OK, just go and have some fun..

..bitch trauma..

..i finally know what trauma is..and its BAAADD..
..this is day 2 after the incident and I am still not able to get over it..we got beaten up by a pack of cops and that is NOT the worst of it..
..this is killing ma sleep..and i am a guy who slumbers the 3rd second i lie on ma bed and now it takes forever..i keep replaying the incident over and over again in ma mind and improvise what i could have said to her.."how come u r acting as if you had nothing 2 do with this? u r equally responsible for what happened yesterday..u were equally drunk as we were..we all decided to go out..when we were getting beaten up by cops,u were sitting peacefully inside the car..and if that DCP wasn't considerate enough to drop u safely back home,even u would have spend that entire night in the police station like us..he(my best friend) din close his eye even for a second the entire night as he was looking for a chance to get his phone back so that he can call u and tell u that he is OK, so that you can sleep peacefully..and what did u do?? very next day u call up everyone and made a huge mess out of this..u drag my mom 2 the police station..u embarrass your husband in front of his entire family and your family,so that you can save your face..and you want him(my friend) to call up everyone and EXPLAIN???..NO!! YOU explain.."
   "my car gets confiscated, my mom pays up for everyone..why did u even come to the police station the next day?..u came empty handed without even carrying your purse..what? u thought u could show ur fat ass and get ur husband out?..u kept on telling his(my friend) sister and my mom 2 scold us while acting as if u were not even there in the scene..u even told his(my friend) sister that u tried to stop us from going out that night..dude(my friend), u r a very nice guy man,but today u get 2 see your wife's true colors..and I don't understand why u still keep supporting this selfish manipulating backstabbing liar.. "

..well,this is exactly what i wanted to tell her,but I could just say the half of it..the lift stopped and she left immediately and I couldn't let out the entire thing..fukkkk.. and now all this rage and the pain is boiling in the inside of me and has thrown me at the mercy of this bitch trauma..i will hate her for the rest of my life...she is a very bad selfish person who wouldn't even mind backstabbing her own husband and friends just to make her look pretty in front of everyone..and i can never forget this incident which showed me who she really is..and this betrayal is affecting me so bad that I am sitting and writing this stupid blog in the middle of the night..people say that you can forgive someone and release your anger, but i can never forgive her and this is my 'bitch trauma'..and its mine FOREVER!!!..

....my mind holds the key..

The night screams my name and when I open the door there is no one in the doorway..mmm..

..Newton was probably a vegetarian..

..i say Newton is a fool..may be a much more apt word is ignorant..and well..ignorance is foolish..so I go back on my statement..Issac Newton is a fool..i mean seriously, he had to sit under an Apple tree and let an apple fall on his head to make him think of gravity??..c'mon i would have discovered it the moment i cracked the egg and the yolk fell right into the pan..or was Newton a vegan?

...my body is a cage..

..what will u do when nothing in life excites u anymore??..well, this is completely based on the idea that you live for all the exciting things life has to offer and for you to take..so this obviously doesn't apply to the one's who fail to see this..who adjusts to whatever comes their way..makes compromises and believes in fate and destiny and all that crap..yeah some one exactly like you..yeah, now I'm just being condescending..
..anyways, back to the question..what will you do when nothing in your life excites you anymore??..how soon do you think that will happen?..how soon do you think life fails to deliver..is life made out of such a small world to run out of anything new..yeah new is exciting (if you didn't know that already)..is it like you fail to see them or is it that life really runs out of options and choices..is this when you feel claustrophobic??..hmm..a lot of questions...
..i have always believed that failure is always a result of your actions..or very rarely a repercussion..so when you fail to see things..new things..it should be your fault..it should be that you are just not open to things anymore..you are just old for that shit..its not age but what you decide to keep in your memory what makes you old..its experience and eventually fear that makes you old..and everyone gets old..its a human thing..so where are am i going with all this?..beats me..
..OK, now lets look at the possibility that we would really come to a juncture when life doesnt really have anything to offer you anymore..life has really run out of options..now that is scary..this is exactly when you become completely helpless..you don't have a choice..OMG..now THAT really is scary..and i thought paranormal activity 2 was scary..but i think we can safely assume that you will never reach that state and that you will be way dead when life really runs out of options..c'mon i can think of a 1000 new and exciting things i can still do..(oh shit that just reminded me of the human physical limitations..guess we can deal with that later)..hmm so life is not the one who is gonna fuck you over..it has to be you..yeah, you will be the one who would fail to see the new (read exciting) things life has to offer you..you will be the one who would have succumbed to the responsibility bullshit that society has tricked you into believing..what a scam that is..what a scam..the scam which has deluded your minds brilliantly...well no wonder, it took 1000s of years to reach its perfection..isn't so perfect..even you fell for it..yeah you who thought you are the smartest thing to walk on this planet after Stan Lee..so anyways..i rest ma case now..its clear to me now..it's only to your fears you can succumb into..it's not the way life takes you it's the way you take life..awesome..I'm glad :)

..leaves out all the rest..

..i mean, what the fuck guys?..people have a tendentious preconceived opinion about almost anything and everything..sooo so much that they are just not ready to believe or accept what others have to say and simply leaves everything out when they get to see what they have already wanted to see..and you being at the receiving end..just kills it..
..for example lets take an accident, a road accident..say one guy met with a bike accident and has given into some minor injuries good enough to get him admitted in hospital for 2 days and bad enough to keep him grounded for 2 weeks..he is now back from hospital and all his friends, "so-called" friends, kins and colleagues are now so eager to know what really happened to him..of-course out of pure concern and curiosity..now, the moment these people comes to know that this guy was drunk when he met with the accident, it's over..it's completely over..everything is so clear to them now..like broad day light..now they know exactly what happened and why he met with the accident..the curiosity is over..concern has gone right out of the window..they have totally made up their mind..there is simply no point narrating the whole story now, telling them that the high beam lights from the vehicles in the opposite lanes blinded him and that he missed the deep pothole on the road on to which his bike went in and went out of control face planting him on the road mercilessly...they are so over this..they will listen to your real story..but simply out of courtesy, these stories are like bouncers which goes over their head which is already convinced that he had this accident only because he was drunk..insensitive fucks!!!..
..i can't believe why people are so stereotypical...i guess its the same with everyone, everyone who can't think out of their beliefs..everyone who is cast into these social/religious skeletons with gestated delusions..yeah, delusions of grandeur, that's what this is..well..now i don't plan to give more examples to prove my point, coz I think I have already made it and moreover made you realize it..and if i haven't, well, you can go fuck yourself..
..i think its high time a revolutionary doctrine that advocates destruction of the social system for its own sake rise up..oh c'mon damn it..even you want it..its just that, i said it..